Post by kaitlinsnapp on Aug 3, 2011 13:37:37 GMT -5
“The End of Solitude”
If there is one thing I hate it is when people act like they know everything about you, you’re whole life, when really they have no clue. No disrespect to William Deresiewicz, but I don’t like the idea of a near fifty year old man, who experienced a completely different childhood, telling me and all my peers why we do what we do. In fact, I strongly believe that the reasons parents and teens fight so much is because there is a huge disconnect in ideals and interests between the two ages. Let’s just lay it out there, parents don’t listen to their kids and kids don’t listen to their parents. A lack of communication and lack of honesty leads to some strong misconceptions, and thus, creates problems.
For example, when Deresiewicz writes, “Today's young people seem to feel that they can make themselves fully known to one another. They seem to lack a sense of their own depths, and of the value of keeping them hidden,” I think he is being unfair. Did he ask any teens about why we connect and use technology nonstop? I don’t think so. Here is my argument. Sure, sometimes kids get lonely and the prospect of having hundreds of virtual friends that we can instantly connect with is nice; however, that does not tell the whole story. Often I believe technology is used as a place of shelter. It is a way to stay hidden as opposed to a way of self-advertisement. Through texting and Facebook, you can become anyone you dream of being. Picture editing allows us to gain a new physical identity online and that can often enstill confidence or at least hide any insecurities. Additionally, conversations over text are often much easier and less awkward for teens than in person. Honestly, I think Deresiewicz’s views on the students’ lack of value for solidarity is backwards. Using technology how we do is a way of hiding ourselves from the real world and all its harsh judgements. We make our fake selves more well known often in an effort to keep our real selves hidden.
Unfortunately, I feel that teens hide for all the wrong reasons. We are not hiding ourselves for the reasons Deresiewicz suggests but rather because we are ashamed and fearful of what others will say about our true selves. We are afraid to put our hearts on our sleeves for fear of being rejected and hurt. We don’t hide ourselves for solidarity but rather for hopes of popularity and superficial attention. In a way I agree that we want to be known, but not as ourselves. We want our remade version of ourselves to be known.
This entire concept is just one larger connection to the problems that develop between teens and their parents. Teens are misunderstood as I’m sure parents’ are as well. As I mentioned before, no child wants to listen to a man who lived in a completely different time period tell them why they are doing what they are doing and why it is troublesome. Maybe, if both sides were more honest with one another and listened completely to each other’s thoughts we would better understand why kids always avoid lonely situations and why parent’s always seem insensitive to a teen’s interests. Until we do that however, I don’t think we’ll ever truly be able to explain the end of solitude.
If there is one thing I hate it is when people act like they know everything about you, you’re whole life, when really they have no clue. No disrespect to William Deresiewicz, but I don’t like the idea of a near fifty year old man, who experienced a completely different childhood, telling me and all my peers why we do what we do. In fact, I strongly believe that the reasons parents and teens fight so much is because there is a huge disconnect in ideals and interests between the two ages. Let’s just lay it out there, parents don’t listen to their kids and kids don’t listen to their parents. A lack of communication and lack of honesty leads to some strong misconceptions, and thus, creates problems.
For example, when Deresiewicz writes, “Today's young people seem to feel that they can make themselves fully known to one another. They seem to lack a sense of their own depths, and of the value of keeping them hidden,” I think he is being unfair. Did he ask any teens about why we connect and use technology nonstop? I don’t think so. Here is my argument. Sure, sometimes kids get lonely and the prospect of having hundreds of virtual friends that we can instantly connect with is nice; however, that does not tell the whole story. Often I believe technology is used as a place of shelter. It is a way to stay hidden as opposed to a way of self-advertisement. Through texting and Facebook, you can become anyone you dream of being. Picture editing allows us to gain a new physical identity online and that can often enstill confidence or at least hide any insecurities. Additionally, conversations over text are often much easier and less awkward for teens than in person. Honestly, I think Deresiewicz’s views on the students’ lack of value for solidarity is backwards. Using technology how we do is a way of hiding ourselves from the real world and all its harsh judgements. We make our fake selves more well known often in an effort to keep our real selves hidden.
Unfortunately, I feel that teens hide for all the wrong reasons. We are not hiding ourselves for the reasons Deresiewicz suggests but rather because we are ashamed and fearful of what others will say about our true selves. We are afraid to put our hearts on our sleeves for fear of being rejected and hurt. We don’t hide ourselves for solidarity but rather for hopes of popularity and superficial attention. In a way I agree that we want to be known, but not as ourselves. We want our remade version of ourselves to be known.
This entire concept is just one larger connection to the problems that develop between teens and their parents. Teens are misunderstood as I’m sure parents’ are as well. As I mentioned before, no child wants to listen to a man who lived in a completely different time period tell them why they are doing what they are doing and why it is troublesome. Maybe, if both sides were more honest with one another and listened completely to each other’s thoughts we would better understand why kids always avoid lonely situations and why parent’s always seem insensitive to a teen’s interests. Until we do that however, I don’t think we’ll ever truly be able to explain the end of solitude.